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In fact,
everything was "Art" to me now, even the scraps of paper I would
find in the gutter. Wonderfully
incomprehensible, yet beautiful in their mysterious glimpses into a world
that existed just beyond my grasp.
I could live
and play in the Japanese world, but never comprehend it in the same way the
Japanese could. The cultural divide was too sharp, the gulf between histories
too wide, the ocean of meaning too deep for me to fathom.
This was
as it should be, I know, but the yearning to understand could not be dimmed.
I wanted to lose myself in this alternate universe, to vanish from western
civilization like a puff of wind.
There seemed to be so much more to offer
my soul here then at home, save for my wife and kids. |